Breathing Space for New Mothers by Alison Rogers & Erin O. White

Author:Alison Rogers & Erin O. White
Language: eng
Format: epub
ISBN: 9781623173432
Publisher: North Atlantic Books
Published: 2019-06-09T16:00:00+00:00

Did You Know …

Accepting ambivalence can set you free. And it can free up energy that would otherwise go into denying feelings. We live in a world where ambivalence about motherhood is prohibited. Mother’s voices of regret are silenced. It is perfectly normal to feel ambivalent about everything from the pain of childbirth to breastfeeding to the constant and unrelenting demands of baby care. The less support we have, the more ambivalence we are likely to feel. When we don’t have adequate help, we have fewer resources to go around, and competition for our time and energy is more intense. Imagine how your feelings about breastfeeding would change if you had another person to do all the cooking and housework for you? Most of us, sadly, don’t have that kind of help, so we are usually exhausted and conflicted while loving our baby more than we could have imagined.

If we can accept ambivalent feelings as a normal part of motherhood, not something to be overcome, hidden, or denied, we can free ourselves. We free ourselves to simply feel what we feel. And then let it pass. It is normal. So you might want to come to your feet and move out into the world, and at the same time, you might want to just lie on the bed and stare at the miracle that is your baby. The more you allow yourself to feel both of these emotions compassionately, without fighting either, the sooner an impulse in one direction or the other will surface. In your own time.

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